The Klutz in the Kitchen’s Grub Reviews:- Slug and Lettuce, Newlands

Slug & Lettuce sepia

So there I was, at a loose end one morning and decided to try out the Slug and Lettuce below the Spur in Newlands, having driven past it a number of times. Breakfast was on my mind, which is something I seldom do, and it was early for me on a weekday morning, so thought in for a penny, in for a pound and went if to check the place out. It was previously a French Bistro, which I’d never been to; they weren’t there long enough for me to try. There were only one table inside when I got there, with no one to greet me I found myself a table and plonked my butt down. A very surly dour po-faced waiter came over with the small laminated menu when he noticed I was at a table. Breakfast on one side and the other lunch specials. I said I wanted to see the full menu and the waiter gave me a strange look of incredulity, his face said it all, WTF do you want it for. Dumb ass I’m customer, you waiter, get it.

Slug & Lettuce newlandsAfter having a good look through all the menus, which were quite boring and pedestrian as with so many franchise restaurants. I wonder what the waiter would have said had I wanted a brunch. Being 11:00 am I decided on The Seanie made up of two slices of toast covered with tomato based savoury mince and topped with two fried eggs, sounds good and simple, neh! On giving my order to the sour waiter slinked off to place the order. I was not asked how I wanted the eggs, which pissed me off, but I was reviewing the place did not make waves as I wanted the full service experience. I had a cold drink that I sipped on whilst waiting for the food. When it arrived dropped it in front of me and he skipped quickly away. I was irritated and somewhat unhappy with what was presented on the plate, one perfect egg and the other, broken yolk and overcooked. Big mistake which should never have left the kitchen pass had the and waiter been trained correctly or the kitchen staff taken pride in their work or had the chef/owner been in the kitchen. The mince lacked seasoning, was quite bland and flavourless. I wonder what the rest of the food is like, if the same standards are used even though The Seanie is really a very simple dish to make and prepare, any Klutz in the Kitchen with rudimentary cooking skills could do better.

What the savoury mince on toast with eggs should have looked like.

What the savoury mince on toast with eggs should have looked like.

The Klutz can only rate the venue ★★ = Better than bad, still not good enough, waste of time and money. Visit at ones own peril.

The Klutz in the Kitchen pays for all food and drink consumed when reviewing venues, and all visits are unannounced and never booked at all. The Klutz will visit the Slug again in a few months to see if any improvements have been implemented and will again review the venue.

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